Money is one of the biggest issues in a marriage because most of the time what one spouse spends money on affects the other spouse in some way. When couples argue over money it’s usually more than just the simple facts of it, such as how much they can put on the credit card or whether or not they can really afford their upcoming vacation. When couples argue over money it tends to be because of a deeper that one of the spouses has, such as a childhood of poverty or a previous partner having a secret bank account.
Since everyone sees money in a different way, lets take an example of someone who uses the excuse that there will never be enough money to compulsively hoard cash; they don’t spend money on anything unnecessary and it can frustrate their partner since there are no vacations or nights out together. On the other hand though, this same attitude of there never being enough money can lead to someone compulsively spending money, thinking that since there will never be enough why bother trying to save it? Neither approach is healthy for the individual nor for the couple.
Money spending/saving has to be something that both partners in a relationship agree upon together, as a united front. Don’t be afraid to talk to your partner about money. It’s okay, and can be smart, to have a joint account to use for household items, vacations, or gifts for the kids. However, it’s also necessary to have your own bank account, so that the money you earn on your own can be used to buy something that you, and not your partner, wants – if it falls under a reasonable price tag.
And here’s an interesting fact: according to Experian Credit Score Marriage Survey Report 2014, the average amount spent by a woman before talking to her spouse is $396 while the average amount spent by a man before talking to his spouse totals in at $1,231. What do you think about that?? Let us know.
Contact us at The Mediation and Family Counseling Group www.mediationandcounseling.com if you need help managing your finances within your marriage. To register for our upcoming presentation at Nassau Commuity College about the Effects of Divorce on Family Systems, please click here.