Things to Know About Divorcing During Your Senior Years

November 05, 2018 /

Looking ahead to the next phase of life can seem pretty dreadful if you can’t stand the person who you’ll be spending it with. Although divorce rates have leveled for most age brackets, there is one division of the population where divorce rates are increasingcouples in long-term marriages.divorcing during your senior years

Concurrently at a time when divorce seems average younger people, the divorce rate amidst U.S. adults ages 50 and older has practically doubled since the 1990s, according to a Pew Research Center report. What are the reasons? More active lifestyles and a decreased blame of divorce, in terms of religion and even society, has made the rates in divorce for older people as termed as “gray divorce” soar.

So, what is the big push behind the rise in gray divorce? People are having this feeling of being entitled to living fully. They have committed to raising children, and now they may want an emotional journey. Maybe they have had years of unhappiness and do not want it anymore.

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Here is what you need to know if you are thinking of divorcing after a long-term marriage.

Why Do Gray Divorces Occur?

Contrary from younger marriages, in which communication and infidelity problems can bring on separation, older couples face complications that may end in divorce, such as:

  • Growing apart: As the couple retire or their oldest child goes off to college, older couples incur more time and begin to realize they have drifted apart from each other.

  • Sex: Differences and detachments in sex drives can turn a marriage south. As people get older, their sexual desires and appetites may begin to change and differ and if it's dramatic enough, it may result in divorce

  • Age: Getting older can be an unwanted welcome reminder for anyone. A very common reason for “gray divorce can be one party divorcing for someone younger.

Watch Out for These Issues in a Gray Divorce

Regrettably for those going through a later-life divorce, issues encompassing the divorce can bemore complicated than foreseen. Here are some issues that may affect spouses going through a “gray divorce” :

Figuring out alimony: As we grow older and move up the corporate ladder compensation becomes much more intricate than when they started. So, the courts can determine alimony, they do not just look at the person’s base salary, they also look at limited stock but also restricted stock options ownership units, work compensation packages, airline miles etc.

How is Property Divided?

This is determined state by state. Connecticut for example, is an equitable distribution state for divorce. What does this mean? There is no law in Connecticut that states that marital property will be allocated equally between the spouses. Rather, the courts in this state apply the principle of equitable distribution, which states that the division should be fair, and equal. Other property terms,

Life insurance: If you will be paying alimony, you will be required to have life insurance in the amount equal to the alimony stated in the divorce decree. If your policy is due to expire, you must obtain a new policy, with a death benefits and duration to cover your spousal support obligations

Pension plans and other retirement accounts: A pension is a promise made by an employer to provide monthly payments to an employee until they pass away. If a divorce should occur this money has to be divided, which can become tricky especially if it’s a government paid pension.

Separate Property vs Martial Property in Divorce: Division of property by the courts is done under two: community property or equitable distribution. Debts are divided according to the same principles. At divorce, community property is generally divided equally between the spouses, while each spouse keeps his or her separate property.

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States will vary differ in some of the specifics, but usually separate property is rather limited in scope. Separate property can include the following:

  • Property that was owned by either spouse prior to the marriage
  • An inheritance received by the husband or wife (either before or after the marriage)
  • A gift received by the husband or wife from a third party (your mother gave you her diamond ring)
  • Payment received for the pain and suffering portion in a personal injury judgment

All other property acquired during the marriage considered marital property, regardless of which spouse owns the property or how the property is titled.Marital propertyan expansive category.

Specifically, do not think you are not allowed to a specific asset (such as a 401K, stock options, etc.) simply because it is titled only in your husband’s name. Usually, all property that is acquired during the marriage is considered marital property, even if your spouse “owns” the property or it is titled in his/her name.

The choice is clear, when you really think about it, mediation is the best way to get a gray divorce.

Are you considering a divorce? Have you have been asked for a divorce by your spouse? If you have answered yes to these questions, then you need to contact a divorce mediator so that he or she can help you work through the process. Divorce mediation can help a couple have a more civil dissolution to the marriage. Keep in mind that at one point you loved this person and vowed to spend your lives together. The decades of your marriage shouldn’t be looked upon as an aberration.

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Contact us today and learn more about our mediation services designed to help get your divorce done in an amicable approach, and handle it with dignity, less stress and LESS MONEY. Contact us for a free consultation, 800-945-6802.

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Also, download this free eBook free eBook to your understand options if facing a “gray divorce.”

“The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it- “Henry David Thoreau

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Award Winning Authors

Dana and Don

Divorce Mediatiors and Marriage Experts


Divorce Mediators, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, Divorce Coach, Divorce Preparation, Marriage Experts


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