Since the pandemic and families have been home, the distribution of housework has become more noticeable. It's been observed by both partners, how much or how little or how well household responsibilities are divided. Now that many partners are home together do you notice any changes in your home?
Following is an excerpt of an article written by Tami Forman,
Although this was written Pre-covid I found it interesting to compare then to now.
'Women, especially moms, tend to hold themselves to high expectations when it comes to domestic duties. The studies are clear – women do more housework than men, across all categories. This is even true when both spouses work full-time. Incredibly, it’s even true when the woman works full-time and her husband doesn’t. (Studies are based on averages and aggregates – your mileage may vary.) And there is a connection between more housework and less paid work – studies also show that men do work more hours for pay (again, on average) than women. My friend Tiffany Dufu has a wonderful article in Forbes titled The Surprising Way Housework Factors Into Breaking The Glass Ceiling on this very subject. When something’s gotta give, many women pull back on professional ambitions – which can mean anything from turning down opportunities that would require more energy at work to opting out entirely.
For real women living real lives, there are a few strategies to keep housework and other domestic duties from squelching your ambitions. You can outsource. You can convince your family to pitch in more. Or you can care less.
Of those three options, lowering your standards is totally free and it doesn’t involve any nagging! It requires the least money and energy (though I did recently suggest to a working mom that if the dirty dishes were a problem she should buy paper plates – a marginal investment if ever there was one).
Ideally, everyone in a family would pitch in to maintain the household. But if Mom lowers her standards it can help in that regard, too. First, if you let things go long enough, someone will pick up the slack. It’s hard to believe, but it’s true. It turns out that both kids and husbands actually do want to wear clean clothes, find their stuff and eat off plates. They will just put up with the lack of these things for as long as they can.'
This advice may be worth a try, maintaining upset over the chores leads to resentment which leads to relationship erosion. Better distribution in the home, frees up both partners, which equals more time to relax and enjoy intimacy.